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Psalm 2 - Juliano


10-12 So, rebel-kings, use your heads;
Upstart-judges, learn your lesson:
Worship God in adoring embrace,
Celebrate in trembling awe. Kiss Messiah!
Your very lives are in danger, you know;
His anger is about to explode,
But if you make a run for God—you won’t regret it!

Running for God is currently all I have right now. I'm in a really weird season of exile and healing.
Family just being one of those things I majorly relied, conceptually, is gone.

I mean, I can meet each of my family members and talk to them, but the concept doesn't exist anymore.
Having that gone really shatters something. Kinda like that one scene in Inside Out. When the whole platform of one's values crumbles.

That is not to say I hate my family or don't want to have a family. On the contrary, I can't wait the day when I can have a family of my own again.
As of now, there's not a place I can call 'home'. That specific 'home' feeling. That is why I say I'm in "exile". Emotionally in exile.

Living on my own, has finally allowed me to give the proper space and time to just have everything sink in.
I love having my own space, but it doesn't feel like home. Yet.

All that I have left is to run for God. And God promises me I won't regret it.

Jesus, thank you Lord that you provide hope in every bleak and dark situation. 
When there's death, you bring life. 
Thank you Lord that you are allowing me to just rest and heal up. 
Be my stronghold. 
I can't wait the day where everything will be made right. And to feel at home. 
In your name I pray. Amen.

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